i mean the suicide bomber incident right on taksim square where i usually say my goodbyes to whomever (it's the usual parting spot), it subliminally shook me up. i was nowhere near the incident. i was walking out in sultanahmet on a clear sunny day when a friend received news that there had been a blast. the fact that it was a human being with 2 detonating objects on him came a few hours later. and it led me to have some real disturbing dreams that same night. i woke up an emotional wreck the next day and it happened to be monday.
i have done so well protecting myself from media, from television, i have been able to turn the page on newspapers with morbid photos, done well looking away at headlines that start with "death..." that anything that is remotely violent shakes me to the core. and the freaky thing is my astrologer had predicted this last month...
i don't want to be this sensitive and then again i don't want to be de-sensitized either. it's not like violence is going to end, because i know there is a balance we don't see. it's not easy to make sense of it all.
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