birthdays

my best ever birthday was when i was 10. everyone i invited came. one of the most important achievements for a 10 year old. and i knew something was up when the numbers lined up, 10th birthday of my life on the 10th day of the 10th month.

and here i am forgetting how old i am. i used to be 25 until i turned 30. and now heading towards 35...the less celebratory i become and the more i feel "yes i love my thirties but the numbers just bother me". i feel this pressure to celebrate or do"something" like i feel on new years eve. you-have-to-be-with-someone pressure.

hell it would be nice to be with someone but if there isn't the nice people i have in my life already are great to start with and end my life with. so my gratitude goes out to all my buddies here and far. i try to imagine life without them and it is hard to imagine it. simple as that. it is very easy to imagine the old ex-es not being in my life. so birthdays...thank you for the kind thoughts and for the friendships that make life interesting and beautiful. the irem here couldn't have been the irem now without any of you.